I rarely like to admit this, to myself let alone others, but I have been having a bit of a tough time writing lately. I’ve felt less than inspired by my practice and lacking enough energy to really commit words to paper (or in this case type out some random thoughts I have that I think people may want to read. Heavy emphasis on MAY). That’s not to say that there haven’t been beautiful moments on the mat or in the studio for me, mostly every week there is something amazing that has happened or continues to be beautiful for me. It’s just become hard to put words or maybe to do the moments justice of their beauty to me, to fully explain how much I am loving life right now. Even my writers brain has told me “keep this for yourself. bask in it, enjoy it.” So I have been. I have had break throughs in my physical practice and even in my off the mat practice, I feel some times as if I have grown immeasurably. I’m just waiting for someone else to notice it too.
That maybe is the problem (both part of my lack of writing and what i battle most in yoga) is that I am waiting for the acknowledgement that others “see” what I have, although it may not be really visible. In our yoga culture today it’s all about “seeing” the evolution in your practice, from start point to “completion of nailing a pose”. How does one acknowledge a shift or change in our behavior? In the way we think? In the way we interact with others or share love? Sadly, we don’t.
I’m not going all “Negative Nancy” on your booty’s this fine Monday, so don’t fret that your lighted heart Liz has gone dark. Instead, i’m just being honest and sharing from my heart. A little Heart On My Sleeve if you will. This too is part of the practice, this part of being truthful and honest (Remember the yamas… Satya: truthfulness! See, i told you I’m digging deeper into yoga. I guess I’m still looking for that acknowledgement. Damn, I’ll stop digressing 😉 ), of sharing what is happening with others. Once on the path of yoga, we all start to experience life a little differently. We start to change. I’m in that process… so thanks for bearing with me 😉 In good new though, this week starts my birthday celebration (how long that celebration will actually be, I can’t tell you, but at least two weeks!) and I look forward to lots of fun, lots of yoga, and some really big fucking hugs!
Namaste y’all and enjoy your Monday!