parenting is yoga:depletion happens

“when it’s good it’s oh so good, when it’s gone, it’s gone” ~ben harper

{side bar: i don’t know what is with me this week and the musical quote, best guess is that some thoughts spark lyrics and may be i hope they do for you too. just go with it.}

As of writing this, I’m in the middle of solo a parenting week. As in, me and the boys. And the dogs. And at the end of the night, there is bed and sleep. Even if that is at 8:30pm. It’s going ok. really, it could be better, but i keep getting all caught up. i do that sometimes, get caught in thoughts or in my own frustration and it just kinda ruins my day. to be fair, i know i am not perfect nor do i really have the ability to make everything work out perfectly. i just sometimes want things to go perfect. “when it’s good it’s oh so good”. 

“But when it’s gone, it’s gone!”

This post isn’t about the good times though…

Maybe it’s the striving for perfect, you know like when you are on the mat and you are working hard (too hard even) to make a pose perfect. It doesn’t fill you up though. It leaves you wiped and depleted. That’s how I feel, like I was working too hard and instead of feeling good about what I did, I just feel like my tank is empty. You can’t keep giving on an empty tank. Some days that’s what parenthood asks of you, to give everything. 

  

Depletion happens. And it happens to us all. Parents or not, giving our all happens a lot of the time. It leads to unhappiness, frustration, angry, and blame. We lash out at those who ask too much from us, we cocoon away in our beds not willing to give any more than we already have, but really we need to look at how to fill up. How to revive our hearts, souls, and energies. To not look angrily at those we have willingly given all {who may not even know they are taking without giving, I mean my 5 month old can’t possibly know better!! How can I blame him?}, but to ask how can I fill up my own cup. 

As in the practice on the mat, we set that intention to be present and to be aware. I ask the same thing each morning, before my body becomes jungle gym, food dispenser, emotional support, and vehicle in life. Today, how can I be full? And how can I give from that place?  And when depletion comes (because it always does!), can I be honest with myself and receive what I need?

Happy Friday y’all. And go fill your cup!

Xo,

Liz

  

 

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